Where I’m at in this point of my life is critical
And even I’ll admit sometimes I act so pitiful
I guess I’m just an introverted individual
So my contact with the outside world is minimal
That’s why I leech on to anybody showing me any sign of love
Because I’m afraid one day they’ll be gone
And then I’ll have to start over without them
Just wishing I could rip their beating heart up out them
And carry it with me, and I’m just so afraid to say it
So I let them leave me and convince myself that I am hated
That’s how I’ve wound up in this state of mind I’m in
So closed off from the world and intertwined in my sin
So I appreciate the offer, but know how it’ll end
So no thanks, I think I’d rather go and see a doctor
But then I’m afraid I’ll have to dress to impress to be formal
In other words have to take a pill to be normal
So please believe me when I say I don’t want you
it’s not that I don’t want you, I just don’t want you to leave me
So please leave me now instead of later and go away
I swear to God and swear to you both that I’m okay

I know that you’re just concerned, you just want to help me
But I’m okay. I promise and I swear to you
Even though these weary eyes tell a different story
I’m okay. You know I wouldn’t lie to you
Even when you hear me scream verbal explosions
I’m still okay. I think I can make it through
This is just how I deal; it’s how I’m coping
Am I in my right mind? No way
But through teary eyes, I reassure you I’m okay

You want to pick at my brain like maggots that feed
On rotten remains buried six feet deep
When you scrape the resin from my brain all that’ll remain
Is a plethora of emotions I can’t begin to explain
I know you see me screaming out waving out my arms saying “OH GOD, IT HURTS”
But I swear to you I’m not in pain
I know we only go by with what we see, but often times what we don’t understand
Is that the truth is not in plain sight
So get it right
It’s such an instrumental feeling
And this can never be intrinsic when we talk about well being
No matter how close my life gets to hell, it is
not in my nature to dwell in petty selfishness
But, like the best of us I often stray from this position
But what can I say? That’s just the human condition
It’s obvious I’ve got issues
But I would never dream of including you in them or instilling them in you
And what gets me..
Is knowing that you know I’m broken and thinking somehow you can
magically fix me
It’s a naive notion thinking you have some sort of remedy or potion
that could pick me up and lift me
So forget it. And forget me.

I know that you’re just concerned, you just want to help me
But I’m okay. I promise and I swear to you
Even though these weary eyes tell a different story
I’m okay. You know I wouldn’t lie to you
Even when you hear me scream verbal explosions
I’m still okay. I think I can make it through
This is just how I deal; it’s how I’m coping
Am I in my right mind? No way
But through teary eyes, I reassure you I’m okay

I told you that I’m okay but you obviously truly
Know me too well because you see right through me
Am I that transparent? I guess I can’t fight it
Because I try to convince myself that I actually hide it
The truth is, you can tell that I’m acting all crazy
As I scream out to the whole world, “PLEASE, SOMEBODY SAVE ME”
But I don’t say it with my words. I say it with the expressions on my face
And the actions that I choose to take
I want your attention so damn much
But I’m afraid that if I get it, I’ll grasp and I’ll clutch
So fucking hard I’ll suffocate the life from you
And dim whatever remains of all of the light from you
So what else am I to do?
I’m just trying to protect you so that’s why I feel I must lie to you
No matter what I try to do
I always feel like I resent myself and take it out on me
In spite of you
Telling me not to be so hard on myself
But fuck that, I’d rather have me all to myself
Because one day these weary eyes may cause you teary eyes
And I’ll have no fucking clue what to say to you besides

I know that you’re just concerned, you just want to help me
But I’m okay.
Even though these weary eyes tell a different story
I’m okay.
Even when you hear me scream verbal explosions
I’m still okay.
This is just how I deal; it’s how I’m coping
Am I in my right mind? No way
But through teary eyes, I reassure you I’m okay

I’m reaching out
I’m closing up
I’m screaming out
But my mouth is shut
To be left alone
Is all I desire
But if I told you I’m telling the truth
I’m a liar
I swear to you